And I wasn't creating a thing, nor did I have a desire to do so.
I was hopeless.
It was icky.
I thought, "Maybe that was it. It was a nice run. . . maybe you're done."
I meditated. I walked. I looked at the birds.
I listened to music.
I traveled. I drank wine. I laughed.
I watched people. I read blogs. I read books.
I sat in my mess of a studio without a bit of inspiration, and looked at the piles and piles of supplies I had . . . not knowing where to even begin.
I sketched . . . a little. But nothing moved me. Not a single thing.
Then, it was my birthday.
I don't usually make much out of my birthday. I don't like or want attention, and my family knows it. Phil was out of town, and it was just a regular day. And it felt like that . . . just a regular day. . . and . . . I was sad.
I thought to myself, "well . . . this is what you wanted."
But in my heart, it wasn't.
So, I grabbed a sharpie and a sketch book . . . and before I knew it . . . this came out of me . . .
It was what I felt deep inside.
I didn't like that feeling. Not one bit.
But, I liked the drawing.
So, I did another . . .
And it made me giggle . . . because I took a silly picture of myself and printed it on my computer, and added it to my sketchbook.
It's exactly how I feel about life right now, and it makes me laugh.
So, I put it on Facebook.
And a couple people liked it. And it made me happy.
So, I did one more . . . because I felt like it was calling me . . .
I looked at this one a long time . . . it's funny how the universe speaks to you when you need it most, you know? I read it over and over, and thought, "hmmm . . . maybe THIS is what I plan to do. Maybe THIS is what is next."
Yes, sometimes I think it's easier if someone would just throw a brick at me.
I did another . . . because I really love this prayer . . .
Then, I added some color . . . because I like color . . .
And I thought, "hmmm . . . maybe I should try color again."
So, I did . . .
It speaks to me. A lot.
Now, I'm bursting. Truly, Bursting.
The ideas keep coming, and I can't stop.
And I feel excited, like my mind is full of hundreds of little thoughts just waiting for to be released.
I don't know where it will take me, but I am so grateful for this feeling right now.
And it all started by getting back to my basics with just a sketch pad, and a sharpie. I got away from all the clutter - all the supplies - all the expectations. I listened to my heart and found words that truly touch my soul, and I am making work that really is from my heart.
Thank you, for being along for this ride and letting me share it with you.
I am most grateful for you.
Wishing you Peace, my friend.
If you are interested in any of my prints, check in my Etsy shop next week. I am not sure what I'll be offering, but if something I have made touches your heart, too, perhaps you will want a copy of it for yourself! I hope to have many of my new art available in note cards and prints. It's exciting!