Melancholy Me



Feeling a little pensive today.

So much to do.

But not feeling like doing much of anything.

The excitement of my creative biz has temporarily stalled,

as I have discovered some copyright issues with the scrapbook paper I am using in my art work. 

I will need to recreate 20 of the pieces I've put my heart and soul into,

in order to sell them on Etsy.

My own carelessness . . . I clearly should have thought about it before.

But, that's what happens when starting something new that you have no idea about. 

Makes me question myself. 

And I don't like that. 

The laundry is done.

The girls are growing, evolving, and thriving, just as should be.

PG returned home last night from another business trip, 

and I've only discovered that the next couple of months will be much of the same

(his traveling.)  

And I am here. 

I do have The Creative Connection coming up . . .

which I am so looking forward to. 

But right now,

I'm overwhelmed with starting this dream of mine,

that the hurdles ahead seem almost unbearable.  

I wonder why some people have that courage, and I fear?

Those inner whispers are too quiet for me to hear today.

Never fear, my friends.

For I need to work through all of these things.

And I will.

With time.

By putting it out there.

Acknowledging it.

And moving forward.

I am escaping to the Cellar with my dearest creative friends on Saturday.

Poor girls . . . I need them more than ever.

How are your dreams today?

Leave me a comment . . . I'd love to know.

The Shocking Truth

Well, my friends, time to take a little break from all the creative talk and share a random moment from my week with you. This one has to do with my Ella . . . oh, how I love this girl.

Ella doesn't start 4 year old preschool until the Tuesday after Labor Day. So, while sister Katie leaves us at 8:45AM and doesn't return until 4:00PM, Ella and I are able to spend a great deal of quality mommy and daughter time together. I'm absolutely loving being at home with the girls the past month. While there are plenty of downsides to losing my job (lack of finances tops the list), the upside clearly is this time with my girls. I have said it before, that I just feel like this fog has been lifted. I am enjoying all the little moments with them that I missed before. And it's not that I missed them because I wasn't physically there . . . I was physically there. I missed them because my mind wasn't there. My mind was thinking about the stresses of my job, worried about projects or productivity, wondering what would be waiting on my desk when I return from days off. All of it.

But I am blessed that now, I can focus. Clearly. On them.

So, one day last week Ella and I decided to take a visit to Starbucks. Oh, yes, my visits there are few and far between now that I am not working. But on this particular day last week, we just needed a Starbucks trip. And here, at Starbucks, is where the truth came out . . .

It started as such a lovely morning. We decided that we would sit inside this day and talk . . . you know . . . like big girls do. We also decided to have a little treat with our beverage. Ella chose the pink glazed mini-donut, and I picked a piece of banana chocolate chip cake.

We had a lovely time and talked about our recent trip to New York, cousin Carlo, what it will be like when school starts, and who our favorite Disney princess is. You know . . . important stuff. We looked out the window as cars went in and out of the drive through and guessed what everyone was ordering. We had a really wonderful time.

She loves her chocolate milk. I love my coffee. And then . . . I started to share my chocolate chips with her. You know . . . those that sit so gently on the top of the bundt cake? That are just perfect to pick off and share with a loved one? Yes . . . I share my chocolate chips with the ones I love. Of course. But Ella, she stopped me.

In the middle of my delivery of the finest thing in the world (the chocolate chip). . . that's when it happened. The shocking truth. Brace yourselves, friends. This one might just bring you to the edge.

"Mom?" Ella said, "I really don't like chocolate." (See . . . below? The chocolate chips are just sitting there. Waiting.) "But Ella," I said, "you like chocolate milk, don't you? I mean, you drank your chocolate milk. What do you mean, 'you don't like chocolate'?"

"Yes," she answered, "I do like chocolate MILK. But chocolate CHIPS. . . nope. I don't like them Mom. They kind of make me . . . crazy. Like this . . ."

And with that . . . I finished my own chocolate chips.

What can I say? She's only 4.

Perhaps this is something she will grow out of. God willing. ; )

Moving Forward and Lessons Learned

Another week has passed, my friends. Another seven days of life has been lived to the fullest. Another 168 hours of laughter, of painting, of friends, of good food, of smiles, of snuggles, of the Disney Channel, of sleeping, of laundry, of Keurig coffee makers and watching hurricane news on the telly.


I love my birdies! Yep, this little beauty will be available and for sale very soon!

I'm amazed at how, week after week, the lessons become even more and more valuable to my life. Here's a look at some of my lessons last week.

• I can not work on my creative biz when the kids are around. Why not? Because I seem to have ended up with 200 business cards that are MISSING MY NAME (Yes, it's true. The 1,001 interruptions got the best of me.) I remembered the biz name, the blog address, email address, even the snazzy QR code for smartphones containing my contact info. But name??? Nope . . . totally missed it. Ah, well. I've ordered the next set . . . last night, when the girls were sleeping.
• While I am sometimes bothered that PG travels so often for work, I am so very grateful that he is so hard working and successful. Very proud of that man!
• I adore my sister-in-law, Maria, because as the rest of the east coast was glued to the TV watching the news for the pending hurricane information, Maria was baking cookies . . . for a barbeque that she was having Friday evening. And she lives in Staten Island. LOVE this girl and she cracks me up!
• I AM an artist. Really. My living room proves it. My art work has taken over the house, and I feel like a regular Van Gogh!
• I am constantly amazed at this blog community and am so grateful for dear blog friends who will remind me when I am not being true to the person I am and who will speak up. (Thank you Lady Jennie!)
• People can change . . . and I have seen it first hand. And it can be good . . . when you always thought it couldn't be.
• Not everyone will totally understand when you are trying to do something new with your life . . . something that is not the norm . . . and that is ok. You have to listen to your dreams and follow them, and leave the doubters behind.
• Not having the stress of my job has lifted the fog that has been over me for years, and I can actually enjoy the little moments in life. It feels pretty darn good.
• My daughters are getting bigger . . . and older. They are become these amazing women who I am so very proud of.

I am sure there were lots more, but these are some that stick out in my mind right now.

How about you? Any lessons learned last week? Leave me a comment and let me know . . . I'd love to hear about them.

Me. Creating.

Just a quick post today, my friends. This time, it's all about sharing. And today, I am going to share with you a few of the pieces I've done recently for my creative biz. These will be for sale in my Etsy shop (opening the end of September.) 

In my collection (hee hee . . . I said, "in my collection" . . . like a real artist. Sorry, I'm a little giddy at the whole idea, and it just makes me giggle). Ok, where was I? Eh-hem . . .

In my collection, I have three series of works that I will be selling.

The first series, called "Times in my Life. . . " contains an inspirational line starting "There are times in my life . . . " Here is a sample of two of the pieces that are part of this series. (I have about 12 more in this group total.)

(I will have three different butterfly pieces available.)

(I will have three different coffee cup pieces available.)

The second series is called "I am . . . ", and here is an example from that group.

The third series, called "One Day . . . " will follow the same sort of inspirational mixed media art. I'll share something from that grouping at a later time.

Finally, I am doing something FUN . . . something ME . . . something I think you'll enjoy. I know many of you are familiar with my "Leanne" character in the header (the cartoon of me sitting at my desk, with my coffee?) Well, I'll be creating a series of GREETING CARDS with her . . . giving some silly yet supportive words of wisdom to the receiver. These are going to be a blast, and I'll be selling sets of these cards that YOU can have!

It's such an exciting time for me. I am so grateful for all of your support, for your kind words, for the emails I've received from many of my blog friends encouraging me as I begin this new chapter in life. I feel like, for the first time ever, I am doing what I was meant to do with my life.

It's an absolutely WONDERFUL feeling.

Peace, my friend. And I'll be back soon with a silly story about Ella that I can't wait to share with you. Thanks for being here today. And please, tell me . . . how do you like the art? I'd love to know.

The Big Apple - Take 3

Greetings friends and traveling followers! Time to return to New York today, for our third (and final, thank goodness) installment of "The Big Apple". Today I'll share just a few more highlights of our trip, and wrap it up nicely with our accomplishments at the end of our travels to the East Coast. As always, I thank you for indulging me and allowing me to share these moments with you. I hope you have enjoyed the glimpse into my life . . . however silly it may be.

So, let us begin. . .

Ella took her very first taxi cab ride this trip. She kept whispering things into my ear to tell the driver, like, "Tell him my sister's named Katie," and "tell him I like Pokemon cards," and "tell him I like cotton candy ice cream." All messages I delivered promptly, to a rather confused man. Our driver was very sweet, though, and even stopped long enough for me to take a photo of Ella outside of the cab.

We loved our dinner in Little Italy . . .

 And loved our dessert in Little Italy even more . . .

After leaving Manhattan, PG and Brandon were not done with their adventures. PG took Brandon to Coney Island to see the legendary boardwalk. Though much of it declined after WWII, it still was a fun day for them.

And, of course, any visit to Coney Island would not be complete without lunch at Nathan's Hot Dogs.  

Ella joined them for a lovely lunch . . .

Mmmmmm . . .

Next they enjoyed a visit to Ralph's Famous Italian Ices. Are you from the NY area? Do you know Ralph's? If not . . . LOOK IT UP! Seriously. It's heaven.

That night, we returned home to an amazing night of friends and family. These ladies make me laugh like no other, and always make me feel right at home (even though it may be years between my visits with them). . .

And Katie and Ella fit right in with all the kids. We are so very blessed.

We took a last adventure in the city the day before we were scheduled to leave. This time, the weather was not on our side, and it rained like I have never seen before. PG and Brandon braved the storm and went to visit the Statue of Liberty (I don't know how they managed this. I guess it's just that determination . . .)

A bit soggy and damp, they ventured to NBC Tower for a behind the scene tour of the comings and goings of the network (including a visit to the Dr. Oz studio, and the Saturday Night Live studio.) Photos were not allowed on the tour, but PG was able to snatch a quick shot of him at Mr. Roker himself. He cracks me up!

While the boys were getting wet in the city, the girls and I went to the American Girl Doll Store. We do this about once a year (or once every other year). This was really the first time Ella got to experience the store, and her eyes were as bright and happy as could be looking at all the dollies.

We enjoyed a special tea and luncheon . . .

With our dolls, of course (don't you love the matching outfits? I bought them at Kmart and they were $19.99 for both the dress and the doll dress. SO cute!)

We really had a wonderful time. Every single step of the way. And . . . I think we did it all.

We laughed, we cried. We laughed until we cried. We ate. We drank. We celebrated.  

We explored. We learned.

We hugged. We lived.

We connected.

We loved.

We survived New York City.

And better yet.

New York City survived US!

Until next time . . . : )

Time

There are times in my life when I want to stop the clock . . . not forever . . . but just for a little while.

Today was one of those times.

Katie started 3rd grade today.

3rd grade.

I don't know why I feel this way.

As I watched her walk to the bus today, I thought about how fast life is moving.

Slow down, baby. Slow down, just a bit.

For me.

New Beginnings . . .

I know that I promised you Part 3 of our Big Apple trip . . . and don't worry, I will be bringing it to you in a day or two. I just needed a break from the whole New York City visit right now. My head is focused on a million and one things today, and I wanted to share them all with you (well, maybe not all million and one things . . . I'll share just a few.)

I'm planning my future, you see. Cleaning up the blog. Researching and working on my creative biz. Dreaming. Believing. Focusing.

All of those things that I've needed so badly in my life.

I'm doing them.

I feel scared. I feel excited. I feel overwhelmed. I feel hopeful. I feel confident. I feel weak. I feel capable. I feel inadequate. I feel . . . it all.

I guess that is what happens when you take a chance on yourself. All your emotions come to the surface. Some of them are positive. Some of them are not. But they are all good . . . in one way or another. And I think it's most important that I acknowledge all of them . . . then move on.

I am trying to clean up the blog - make it a little easier on the eyes. Not as busy. Changing the header here or there, and cleaning up the pages. What do you think? ( . . . please let me know in the comments. I need your help and feedback.) I created a new blog button that you can grab at the right, if you'd like. I wanted to do something a little different (and not yet sure I like the idea of my mug being on it, but what the heck, I'll try it out. What do you think?) I have toyed with the idea of switching over to wordpress, but think I am going to hang tight on blogger a little bit. I'd love to pay a designer to come up a with a real snazzy website for me, but that might have to come down the line. (It's a great thing to put on my 'goals' list.)

Speaking of which, I'm all over my "Goals" list. I'm dreaming . . . and writing it down. All of them. My dreams to one day be published in a magazine, my wish to make a living selling my art, my hope to teach my daughters that 'yes, you can follow your dreams (even at the age of 40) and they CAN come true'. Yes, my Goals. I have a short term list, and a long term list. And I am working on them. One day at a time.

I will share just one photo with you from the NYC trip today . . . a shot the PG took from the ferry as he and my nephew headed into Manhattan on a foggy, wet Sunday. But it's a beautiful picture. I just love it.

What a symbol, Lady Liberty is. A symbol of Hope. A perfect photo for this post, don't you think?

Wishing you all a wonderful weekend. I'll be back soon with the final installment of our Big Apple trip, and more!

Happy Day!

The Big Apple - Take 2

Greetings vacation viewing friends. I hope part one of our vacation series titled "The Big Apple" was enjoyable. Thank you for returning today for "Take 2". This one promises to be a star-studded event that will knock your socks off!

When I last left you, we were aboard a double decker bus in the middle of Times Square. Actually, I think we got off of the bus and had a piece of New York style cheesecake. But as soon as every last morsel of that cake was eaten (and the plate was licked clean), we returned to the bus and visited some more of Manhattan.

This is where our story picks up today . . .

 PG and Ella . . . what a pair . . .
 followed by Mom and me. Cute, aren't we?

It was an absolutely BEAUTIFUL day in the city. The temperature was perfect, and the sun was out shining over us as bright as can be.

After seeing much of the downtown area, we exited the bus at Ground Zero. It has changed so much since we were last here in 2009. Much of the space is now a construction site, so you can not get any where near the actual place where the buildings stood. We walked through a preview are for the 9/11 Memorial and saw all of the plans for the sight. (Click this link to the memorial website for more information.) It's so hard to believe what happened in this very place almost 10 years ago. 10 years. Can you believe it?

You can't help but reflect on the events of 9/11 when visiting Manhattan. Through our many trips there the past few years, I have gotten to know a number of people who were in the city on that day. People who lost friends and loved ones and people who volunteered to help others during that time.  Can you remember how our country united after the tragedy? After the horrific incidents of that day, we started to look each other in the eye again. We started to care. Sometimes I feel we have lost that unity. But when I walked through the preview of 9/11 Memorial, those feelings return. Chills.

The new World Trade building (which will be known as "One World Trade Center") looks amazing. They have constructed up to the 80th floor and are moving quickly.

After our visit to World Trade, we headed over to Little Italy.

Sigh.

This restaurant below (Positano) is where PG and I ate after he asked me to marry him in 1997. (Seriously.) We had forgotten the name of the restaurant in all of the excitement of becoming engaged in New York, but knew the name began with a "P" and could clearly remember the inside. Years ago, we searched up and down Mulberry Street to find it, and did just that. This is the first time we brought Katie and Ella here, and I love this photo of them in front of it.

PG and I shared a special moment while enjoying dinner with our family.

Then we found a church where we stopped to take photos years ago, and snapped a few more shots now. I'll share older pictures with you at another time, but it was pretty exciting to be there this time with the girls.

We were pretty exhausted after our adventures this day, so couldn't wait to settle in at our hotel. In the middle of Time Square, our view from the 41st floor was breathtaking . . .

And here are just a few shots of Time Square for you, at 9:30 PM. . .

I love these photos . . . the colors, the excitement of the city, the look on the faces of all the people. It's 9:30 at night, but as crowded as if it were the middle of the afternoon. It makes me think of my dad, who would be tucked in bed by 7:30 PM every night (he started worked early in the morning) and he would be so frustrated with me if I was just going out with friends at that time. I used to think, "Dad, there is a whole world out there that is STILL UP and doing things at 7:30 PM." My Dad would not believe Time Square.

The next morning, PG caught the girls looking out the window of our room. I absolutely love this next photo. Oh, the places they'll go . . .

At least I have a few more years with them, though.

So, after a brief Starbucks run (there were TWO in our hotel! Yippie!) we met up with Whoopie and some other celebs. My friends . . . you are about to be amazed.

Grandma C had to have a picture with Captain Jack . . .

And I really thought Katie was going to pick up this next one and bring it home with her . . . .

Yep. She's got that Beiber fever thing. But it's seriously cute, don't you think?

Next, Grandma C's interview with Mr. Al Roker and Mr. Matt Lauer. . .

. . . while my nephew enjoys a moment with Regis and Kelly.

Phil likes to joke that this next picture are Katie and Ella's real parents . . .

But nope . . . HERE are their real parents . . . (I swear, any opportunity to "ham it up" and PG and I are right there!)

And last but not least, my favorite of all time . . .

I do LOVE Lucy!

Ok, my friends. That's all for this installment. I'll conclude tomorrow with Take 3, where I'll take you on an adventure for hot dog, share a soggy day at Lady Liberty and show us having tea with some dollies. (Sounds thrilling, doesn't it?) Oh, and can you believe there wasn't a single photo of FOOD in this post? Well, we'll make up for that tomorrow!

Hope your day is filled with lots of STARS!!!!

I bid you Peace!