Embracing ALL of Me

I've sat down and written this post three or four times now. I guess if something doesn't come easily, then I should just give it up, huh? For some reason, though, I couldn't. Especially after reading so many blogs this week on "embracing imperfections". Please allow me to share my own "embracing" story . . . the good, the bad, and the ugly.

When I started writing this post, I was heated and the blood was boiling. I was venting to the max and I wanted to tear it up with all my blogland friends. I think hanging around in blogland with my dear friend Nicole has got me liberated! ;) 

But then I decided that I needed to approach it all a little differently. I want to stay true to the person I am, so I'm decided to put a positive spin on what made me so annoyed this week.

Allow me, if you will, to share . . .

A few days ago, I stumbled upon a couple of blogs that just made me stop in my tracks and wonder … What in the world is happening? (It doesn’t matter what the blogs are or who they belong to, so none of that will be shared.) What bothered me was what was written and the struggles the authors are obviously faced with. For them, I dedicate this post . . . on embracing life - all of it.

One of the blogs was written by a woman who has, in the past 2 years, gained some weight. Now, I do not know this person directly, but what I can find out through her words is that she's been a little bit on the chubby side for most of her adult life (she tells you that in her blog.) Stick with me, I swear I am not judging her weight in ANY WAY!!! If you know me – you know that I AM CHUBBY and the last thing I would do would be to comment negatively on another person. But here’s where I get annoyed . . . her past 4 or 5 (or maybe even 10, because quite frankly, I stopped after reading 5 of them) blog posts are completely written about the excuses as to why she is chubby and why she has gained weight. She goes on, in great detail, to justify and explain, to self diagnose (she says so, herself) everything that is wrong with her 'medically' and why she is who she is. She discusses, in great detail, with very medical terms and definitions, why she is a little more plump this year than last. However, she comes right out to say she hasn't been to a doctor, although it could be 'blah, blah blah' that has caused her weight issue.

Here is where my frustration comes in . . .

For the love of the Lord . . . can it be that she is just . . . CHUBBY???? Do we have to, in the middle of making ourselves feel better about ourselves, come up with medical problems to explain our chubbiness? And not only medical issues, but she even goes on to blame her husband, his work schedule, her marriage, her children, and pretty much everything else around her for her weight.

I don’t know why . . . but this really really bothers me.

You see . . . I am chubby. (I KNOW! SHOCKING, isn't it???) But wait . . . let me clarify . . . I am chubby because I don’t take care of myself. I am chubby because . . .  I snack at night, when it is absolutely the WORST TIME possible to do so. I am chubby because I should exercise more and I should eat less. I am chubby . . . because of how I live my life.

NOT because my husband travels so much and I am home alone.
NOT because the girls go to sleep and I am bored at night and have nothing else to do.
NOT because I have a thyroid problem, or “this” or “that” wrong with me.
NOT because my gym shoes are uncomfortable, my socks don't fit right, and I don't have the money to buy new shoes.

NO, not at all. I am chubby . . . because of ME.

And here is the thing . . . I am who I am. THIS is ME. And I recognize that I, and ONLY I, can change it. There isn’t a medical problem that has caused me to be this way (although I do recognize that there are some illnesses and medications out there that cause weight gain, I really do). Someday I will be able to get control of myself and take care of myself - I believe that. Until that time, I'm going to accept myself and embrace myself. And not focus on the negative of what is "wrong" with me. People spend so much time focusing on the negative then just cutting to the chase. So today, I’m cutting to the chase.

Now, before you sign me off and un-follow me, deciding that you don’t want to read me anymore (which I hope you won’t do), I want to say that I do understand our blogs are our own, and we each have the absolute right to write whatever it is that we want. I have been know to admit that my own blog is very much a therapy session for me, and I have often stepped on the Pity-Party-Podium and written about it to you. Most of us have, at one time or another.  However, I've got the feeling that this sort of "woe-is-me" writing is what this person does all of the time. Well, I guess that might just be the purpose of her blog. I will say that I applaud the author as she works through these issues of hers, for I know that talking about something as personal as your own weight is not comfortable for everyone (Lord knows, it certainly isn’t comfortable for me).

But what I really wish I could do is get her to stop and embrace the person she is . . . chubby and all. I guess that is what this post really is about . . . don't throw excuses out there . . . don't blame everyone else for your life . . . stand up . . . take ownership of who you are and what you are . . . but above all else . . .LOVE YOURSELF. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly.

Yes, life is hard. But there comes a time when you have to forgive yourself, love yourself, and move on.

Today, I'm moving on  . . . and I probably won't visit that particular blog any longer. I don't think my words would even help her. But maybe someone reading this will stop and realize that it's ok to be "chubby" . . . it's even better than ok. It's damn near perfect . . . imperfections and all.

Are you Wishing your Life Away?

Do you ever find yourself in a bit of a rut and wishing the hours away?

I do . . . more often than I care to admit.

I do this when I am at work. I work Mondays, Tuesday and Thursdays. And every single Monday and Tuesday, I wish for it to be Wednesday, when I can put my Mom hat on and be at home with my girls. On Thursdays, I wish for it to be Friday, when I can, again, put my Mom hat on and be at home with my girls. When the weekend arrives, that is probably the only time I don’t wish for the time to go faster, but I wish for the clock to stop (I’m so indecisive, aren’t I?)

I wonder if I did something more creative in my job, then perhaps I wouldn’t wish for the time to fly by. I wonder if I painted or wrote or created in my job, then I would spend my off days wishing to be at work.

Hmmmmm . . .

Create.

I remember that word.

Do you?

That word was supposed to be my Word of the Year for 2010.

Create.

What happened?

Where did you go?

You came out a few times in the past 9 months . . . but didn’t stay anywhere near as long as I hoped you would.

Instead, you flew by.

Come back, will you?

I miss you.

Did you have a Word of the Year? How are you doing with yours? Leave me a comment . . . I’d love to know.

I'm in the Nest today!

Just a quick little update, friends! Today I am being featured over at a lovely little place I like to hang out called, "Mama's Little Nestwork". Do you know Mama Hen? She (and her little chick) are just about the cutest people in blogland, and last week she contacted ME about being featured at her blog ... I was thrilled and am still feeling the happiness from her email!!! THANKS, Mama Hen!!!

So, check it out! You can read more about me and Mama Hen here . . . (or, click on the button

Now, if you happen to be visiting from the Nestwork for the very first time, please make yourself at home!! Pour yourself a lovely cup of coffee (or perhaps a glass of wine, if you like that sort of thing) and take a look around.

There are some lovely little orange tabs at the top of this screen that will take you to all sorts of wonderful places where you can learn About Me, read some of my Best of Chaos posts, see who has received honorary "Get Out of Crankville Free" Passes (or perhaps pick up your own), see some clever cutie Projects I've done, or even check out some blogs I love in my Blog Roll page. Last but not least, perhaps you'll want to know more about my header and where it came from. If this is you, check out my Blog Design tab. Whatever your fancy . . . I just hope that you enjoy your visit and come back soon!

Thanks to dear Mama Hen for the feature, and I look forward to making some great new friends!

Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. - Christopher Robin to Pooh

My Wish for Them

I wonder what they will be like when they are older . . .

Will they still be each others best friend?

Will they still listen to each other as intently as they do today?

Will they remember how much they make each other laugh right now?

Will they be there in good times and bad?

Of all the things in life I am blessed for, one of the tops has to be that God has given me TWO amazing daughters to grow together and be together in this crazy world. And if there is anything I can tell them about their relationship with each other, it would be to never forget the importance of their friendship.  

If I could make a wish for my daughters, it would be . . .

That when life is hard, they pick each other up and carry each other through the hard times. 

That when life is good, that they enjoy it together.

That when there are obstacles placed before them, they work through them together.

That when they are grown and have families of their own, they share their lives with each other.

That they ALWAYS LAUGH and remember the joy they brought to each other when they were young girls.

That they love and accept each other, just the way they are.

That they enjoy their differences and embrace their imperfections, together.

And that no matter where life takes them, that they will remember they once were little girls, holding hands, eating ice cream, laughing, and exploring life side-by-side. 

 

Living a Happy Life

It's been said that Walt Disney World is the happiest place on earth, and I think that much of that statement is true. Underneath the imagination and magic of Mickey and Cinderella, are simply some very happy people. Truly.  Pleasant, kind, smiling, happy people. And they are employees.

It's kind of annoying. Well, not really. But, just a little.

How can these people be so happy?

I've been think about that quite a lot since our trip . . . the whole idea of "happiness". When starting my blog I chose a title that ended in "happiness" because I truly do believe so much in living a happy life. I try. I'm not always bubbles and ponies, but I try to BE happy. I'm wondering what makes others happy? Not the "Oh, I just won a million dollars" happy. I'm talking about just day to day happiness. The feeling of complete contentment with the life we are living and the things we are doing in it.

While wandering through Magic Kingdom last week, I lost the rest room. The happy Disney people give you these handy dandy maps with the little icons on them to show you where the rest rooms are located, but at one point I was so turned around that I couldn't figure out which way was up. So, I looked around for the closest Disney happy person, and asked for directions. The first employee I found was a young man, probably in his mid-30's, who was sweeping up popcorn, empty food wrappers, gum, and whatever else some not-so-happy people dropped on the ground for him to clean. I approached him expecting to really annoy him with such a question (I had a map in my hands, after all), and said, "I'm sorry for interrupting, could you possibly tell me where I can find the nearest rest room?"  To my surprise, this young man lifted his head and with the brightest smile and happiest eyes ever, and routed me to the location I requested with such enthusiasm and pleasantness, you would have sworn he was a cartoon character. I was taken back by his happiness. Really. And he knew it. I think I said, "Wow. .  " or something like that, and he said, "Have a wonderful day, Ma'am," with a wink and a smile, and returned to picking up garbage.

On the way back from the rest room, I passed my friend as he moved on to another area of the park to clean. As I passed him, he looked up, smiled, and gave me a salute with his index and middle fingers. I've thought about him a few times since then, and now as I write this post. I wonder how he, in the middle of picking up the garbage of an theme park, is able to be . . . happy.

When was the last time you really thought about what makes you happy? It's been a while for me, so today I'm making a list and reminding myself of the things in this life that bring me joy, that bring me contentment, that make me happy.

In case you were wondering, here are some day to day things I came up with that really do make me happy, in no particular order:

• seeing my PG's cell phone number on our Caller ID and knowing that when I pick up the phone, I'll hear his voice
• the smell of Johnsons & Johnsons baby lotion
• flowers . . . any color . . . any style
• the moment my husband comes home after a long business trip or a day at work . . . just knowing that my family is together in our home makes me completely and totally happy
• coming up to the window in a Starbucks drive-thru and smelling the coffee . . . seriously . . . happy
• the smell of freshly popped pop corn
• hearing either of my daughters say, "I love you, Mommy"
• thinking of the movie "Staying Alive". . . seriously . . . there's no Oscar wins for this movie, but just thinking about it brings a smile to my face . . . John Travolta dancing like a bad Solid Gold Dancer . . . HAPPINESS!
• peace
• knowing that all the laundry is done and put away
• listening to my daughters be especially kind to one another
• reading comments from dear blog friends 
• the hour of quiet time I have in my family room at night when the children and hubby are sleeping and I have complete and total alone time . . . happy
• the first snow fall
• when I step out of the shower in the morning and find that PG has left a cup of coffee right there on the bathroom counter all ready for me . . . bliss
• freshly painted tootsie toes right after a pedicure
• snuggling with my daughters at the end of a long hard day
• being alive . . . really

Recognizing that happiness is different for everyone, I asked Katie and Ella what makes them happy. You might get a kick out of their replies.

This is what makes Katie (age 7) happy . . .

• ocean sounds
• playing with friends
• McDonalds
• silly bands
• chasing Ella
• when Daddy is home
• swimming
• one on one time with Mom
• being tickled

This is what makes Ella (age 3 1/2) happy . . .

• Katie makes me happy when she eats funny carrots (side note: I have no idea what she is talking about!)
• juice
• when Katie draws a 3 (side note: Again, I have no idea what she is talking about!)
• when Mommy goes like this (Ella starts tickling herself) and I get tickles that make me laugh
• playing Super Mario on the Wii
• hamsters (side note: we don't have one, but my neighbor does and Ella is obsessed with it!)

Today, I challenge you to focus on the good in your day. The little things. Not the big problems that weigh you down, but the freedoms and little luxuries that make us smile. Take note of the things that are around you that bring you happiness, and remember that you make a choice to live the life you live . . . today, let's all be happy.

I know I will.

While you're at it, feel free to share some of the things that make YOU happy in the comments. I'd love to know (and maybe I won't feel so bad about my silly "Stayin' Alive" happiness after I read some of your list!)

Have a wonderful day, friends!

We're Home!!!

Happy Mickey Mouse and Bippity Boppity Boo to YOU, dear friends! We are back - alive and well - after one fun filled week of merriment and all things fabulous in Walt Disney World!!!

And boy-oh-boy, I'm tired.

I can't believe that the trip we saved and planned for well over a year has come and gone. This trip truly was all that I hoped it would be, and more. The fun started upon our arrival to Florida last Friday - and continued for 6 nights and 7 days, until we boarded the plane and came back to sweet home Chicago. Let me tell you - as a young 39 year old girl who has never been to Disney before, I was in awe of this empire that the great Mr. Walt himself built. I was moved to tears many many times through out the week, and I was thrilled to be able to bring my daughters here to enjoy it all.

Instead of boring you all week with posts about our trip, I thought I'd share just a few photos and highlight some of the very best moments right now. First and foremost, please allow me to introduce to you Princesses Snow White, Ella and Katie . . .

. . .  really . . . three of the prettiest ladies I've ever seen. We started the trip with breakfast with the Princesses in Cinderella Castle, and it really was as magical as I dreamed it would be. Arriving at Magic Kingdom on the very first day was so special, and walking down Main Street with Ella and Katie dressed as Snow White and finding the Disney employees (aka cast members) bow and greet Ella and Katie with "Good Morning, Princess!" as we slowly made our way to the castle made me melt. My eyes filled with tears to see my little girls as they responded with soft "Good Morning" in reply. The folks at Disney sure know how to make you feel like a true princess, and the sparkle in Ella's eye was all that I needed to see to know that it was going to be a special day!

However ... all good things must come to an end. On this particular day, it didn't take long for me to realize that I was not AT ALL a "roller coaster" kind of girl. Here is my face after riding a particularly easy roller coaster called Big Thunder Mountain Railroad.

PG snatched the picture of us just as we were coming round the bend to exit the ride. As you can see . . . I was not happy. What cracks me up about this photo even more than my face, is ELLA right behind us. She just finished going on the same ride and she looks absolutely unfazed. Ah, well. Shortly after this ride I declared myself a "RIDE FREE" zone and (with the exception of a water ride here or there that I went on to simply relieve the hot weather) all was good for the rest of the trip. 

We got ourselves all fancied up one night for a lovely dinner . . .  

The girls got all dressed up in costume, once again, for Mickey's Not-So-Scary Halloween Party where they tricked and treated for hours. It was SO MUCH FUN to go through the park and enjoy the fall decorations and see the spooky Halloween parade.

At the end of the evening of the Halloween Bash, the Disney folks again amazed me with an absolutely awesome parade and firework display. PG did an absolutely fantastic job of taking some really cool photos of the fireworks that I had to share with you. It was honestly the best fireworks display I have ever seen in my life (and I do think I've seen some pretty good ones before.) I will never forget it . . .  

Of course, any visit to Walt Disney World wouldn't be complete without a visit with Mickey and Minnie . . . 

I could go on and on with lots of other things . . . and I'll probably share a few more stories here or there this week of a few observations of our adventures. But for now, I just wanted to share a little piece of this wonderful vacation with you.

I hope you all are doing well . . . thanks again to my guest post bloggers this week. I can't wait to spend a few hours in front of the ol'computer and catch up on all of your blogs. How are YOU??? Leave me a comment and let me know how your week was and what is new in your life . . . I'd love to know!!!

And thanks, again, for sharing in our most recent adventure!  

It really is the most magical place on earth! 

Guest Post #5: Destination: Unknown

Last but most DEFINITELY NOT LEAST in our week of talented Guest Bloggers, is the brilliant and amazing Nicole, from Destination: Unknown. I can't remember if, in this land of Blog, I found Nicole first or she found me (of coure, I'd love to take full credit for it), but I do know that what has become a good read (her blog) has turned into a true friendship with someone who I admire and respect whole heartedly. Nicole's writing is full of passion, honesty, and humor, and I love that when I stop by her blog I never know what I will find. It could be a stroll down memory lane, or a heated post about a subject she believes strongly in. Whatever it is, I am grateful to call her my friend, and am happy to introduce you to her today. Introducing, Nicole, and her post titled . . .

Growing up in Creative Chaos

Some of my friends grew up in a good old fashioned southern home. Mom and Dad (which they more than likely referred to as Mama and Daddy) with a few brothers and sisters, barbeques on the back porch with Lynard Skynard and the Allmand Brothers playing on the boombox, grandma bringing over the pound cake and a big Georgia Bulldog flag hanging on the front of the house.

I did not.

Words like set & lighting design, acrylics and charcoal, toe shoes and leotards, ink wells and parchment, bodhran and violin float through the halls of my home. While classical music streaming through the stereo on Sunday morning, followed by lunch with coucous or hummus and other oddities were placed on our table.

There was a kitchen witch hanging from the ceiling in the kitchen. Dream catchers were bought at festivals. All of the art work had to be done by an actual artist (more than likely my mom.) You weren't allowed to touch the beautiful pens used for calligraphy by my father. I was not allowed to take my dance costumes or shoes out to play in. My sister collected odd musical instruments. I spent afternoons memorizing my lines from a play, while my other friends went to softball practice. My summers were spent in dance classes or theater classes or a writing workshop. I watched from afar as my neighbors ran outside to hang out by the pool and play volleyball.

I still remember coming home one afternoon and finding my sister covered in plaster with straws coming out of her nose. Mom was making masks. I remember stepping over newspapers on the floor, some were wet with paint, with beautiful pictures coming to life on a canvas. When I would walk into some of my friends homes, their mom would be baking or watching the soaps or scrubbing the tub.

Needless to say - in a house filled with creativity comes chaos. I say that gently.. but honestly. The house was less than organized. My mom loves to live by the mantra "A Clean House is a Sign of Insanity." The bizarre, the different, the cultural, anything against the societal norm was embraced.

With that being said - I fought against it as long as I could. As I grew up and made it through college, I went for a more "normal" vibe. Tried as hard as possible to be more "conservative" and look and act a certain way. I walked away from my more creative past. Separated myself from my family and their "way of life" as much as possible.

But when I am shopping, or reading, or thinking - it is all creative chaos. I have since returned to my roots and find that it is so deeply ingrained in me - that I can never be that "societal norm." I think I walk a fine line - safely working in a more "corporate setting" with a sprinkling of creativity. I am drawn to a more bohemian lifestyle, but surrounded by people who would prefer an afternoon of football and nachos.

I have since married a beautiful egyptian. He's a writer, a lover of english literature, a believer in the power of the pyramids and mystics of the ancient. He loves to be in love and is thrilled to attend theater, art openings, symphonies, and festivals. We read poetry together. He is in touch with his emotions and is not afraid to be sad or thrilled.

He brought "life" back to me.

But at the same time - in his culture - the "wifey" is expected to keep a perfect home. I grew up in creative chaos.

Where can you strike the balance between the two?
 
- Nicole
 

Guest Post #4: Words of Me Project

What a fantastic week of Guest Bloggers!!! I am so enjoying each of their posts, and I hope you are too. By now, I am probably all Mickey Moused OUT and SO tired of singing "It's a Small World" or hearing "Some day my Prince will come!" that I am probably sneaking some time to visit your blogs, but not quite ready to return from the Magic of Disney. So, today, I have an amazing guest post that made me laugh and smile the whole way through it, written by my dear blog friend, Leslie, from {Words of Me Project}. Les (as her friends call her) and I stumbled upon each others blogs about a year ago, and I have a special place in my heart for this gifted and inspiring lady! She shares wonderful creative adventures and stories of inspiration and hope on her blog. If you don't know her yet, sit back and enjoy this wonderful post, titled . . . . 

My First Date with Dave 

Before I get to my post I just wanted to THANK my dear friend Leanne for asking me to guest post on her amazing, well-written blog. Leanne was one of my first Blog readers {and I think I was one of hers} She has become a dear friend and I look forward to meeting her one day.

Okay, so on to my post...sit back, relax and hear all about my first Date with Dave {my wonderful husband} or as I like to call it "The day my heart was ripped from my chest, torn to little bits and scattered all over the pavement for people to walk on but I still fell in love with you anyway" Date. :)

We met at KNIM radio station. I was an announcer. He was the new guy in town and owner of Domino's Pizza. It was love at first site for me {that's another story and oh, so true}. Him? Well, let's just say he was a bit S  L  O  W when it came to women. ;)

Those first few weeks after he moved to town we spent quite a bit of time together. Well, not together. Not really. I mean we were together but more on a professional level. It went like this...he walked into the station, I met him in my office and took him to the studio to cut radio ads. I'd sit behind my board of buttons and levers while he sat across from me, face behind a microphone ready to record 30 seconds of Domino's Pizza goodness. Dave started every ad like this...

"Whoo, whoo, whoo, this is Domino Dave."

{That was nearly 20 years ago and he is still known for these ads in town!!}

After several takes we'd listen to each one, choose the best and put it on a carte, ready to hit the airwaves. We got to know one another in between takes and before long instead of spending 10 minutes recording his ads it was taking up to an hour.

Dave and I went on our first date the week before July 4th. I had no idea where this young, hot business man was going to take me but I was sure it was gonna be good. He had hinted we may go to Clarinda for dinner {there is a super, fancy schmancy steak house there} so I made sure to wear my best outfit and spent hours perfecting my hair.

I mean, you know how it is...don't you girls? The hair has to be lookin' good for you to feel good about how you look? Right? And back in 1990 waaaay BIG hair was still in. The more Aqua Net the better. {at least for me anyways}. I had one of those "punky" do's. Picture this: a nearly shoulder length mullet with a spiky top...oh and I had permed hair. It was fantastic. {and required an entire can of spray each week... and whatever you do...be careful using matches around my head....seriously.} Oh yeah, Babee, I was ready for a serious night on the town.


So there I was waiting on my front porch when I heard it.


Very LOUD music.

Not the jump up, bang your head, rock stuff.

Nooooo....it was more like....Rock Me Amadeus...but for real. The REAL Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was blaring from his black 1989 Honda Prelude.

I just happened to think this was the hottest car out there...it even had a sunroof. SaWeet!

Anyway, so he pulls up, Mozart so loud it about broke my eardrums. {eh, what did you say?} All I could think was..."This guy is a little bit weird. Hey, I like my music loud, too...but think Quiot Riot, Def Leppard or Van Halen..ya' know what I'm sayin'??


"Where are we going, Dave?" I asked after he had turned down the music a bit.

"How does Clarinda sound?"

Ohhhh, he was gonna take me to that fancy whancy place!!! {that I sooooo could not afford}

"Clarinda sounds amazing, Dave," I answered happily.

"Great! Clarinda has a Pizza Hut and I thought we'd go there to check out the competition!"

I was speechless. Really? Really we were going to Pizza Hut? The OWNER of Domino's was taking me to PIZZA HUT!!! {on our first date?}

We went to Pizza Hut.

Being the gentleman he is...Dave ordered for both of us.

Not one but TWO large pizzas.

Two.

Yes, you read that right...there was two of us and he ordered us two large pizzas. Enough to feed me, him, the Spoofhound football team and a family of four. Did he think I was fat? I mean I have always been kinda sorta pudgy but did he honestly think I could eat an entire large pizza by myself? Oh, and I almost forgot...he ordered breadsticks, too! I didn't know what to say. So many thoughts were running around in my head. Where was this guy coming from? He hadn't seemed weird at the station.

Hmmmm...

I gave him a break, sat back and enjoyed the evening. Talking came easy for us. This date was going along pretty well, considering...

After a few hours we decided to head back to the 'Ville and catch a movie.

So there we were driving along, windows down and the warm, summer breeze blowing on us...everything felt just right. This was the happiest I had been in months.

Then it happened...

"Hey, Les I've been meaning to ask...what's that in your hair?"

My hair? I panicked and began patting my head, searching for whatever might be wrong with it. Had something blown in the window and landed amongst the perfectly sprayed strands?


"I don't know what you mean, Dave."


"Well, it looks like a bird has made a nest in your hair," he replied with genuine concern.

A bird, in my hair, a nest? What was he talking about? Now like I said before...a girl and her hair have a love/hate relationship. If our hair looks good then we feel good. If our hair looks bad then we feel...like we're failures, we ate too much at dinner and now we're fat, we're stupid, we're not pretty or cute or fun, we shouldn't even be allowed to walk on the face of the earth...we are losers!!!

"Uh, I don't know what you mean, Dave?" I said a bit nervously.

"Well, your hair is like all matted and messy...I've just been looking at it all night."

My heart sank. He hated me. It was over before it even started.

And all because I was having a bad hair day.

A few minutes later and we were in Maryville headed towards the theater. Did I want to go? Did he want to go? I mean, gee...with my hair all matted and nest looking. Why in the world would he want to be seen with me?

This large pizza eating, bird nest hair looking mess.

Dave whistled as he opened the passenger door for me. Smiling he took my hand and helped me out of the car.

"What movie are we seeing?" I asked him shyly.

"I was thinking we'd go to Pretty Woman. Okay with you?"


Oh, yeah, sure I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing than watching Julia Roberts run around with perfectly long, flowing curls and a body that looks like she eats anything but large, greasy Pizza Hut pizzas.


Can't wait...I smiled sweetly.

The rest of the night? It was sweet. We held hands, cuddled a bit then said good night. Dave was the perfect gentleman. Well, perfect all except for the Pizza Hut thing and the bird nest hair thing, and then there was that Pretty Woman, Julia Roberts thing {I still don't like that movie}.

I saw Dave the very next day. And the day after that. And the day after that. We were married nearly 2 years later and this October we will celebrate 18 years together.

My friends always tell me things like...you two are sooo cute together. You never argue and you always are holding hands, going on dates and talking to one another. What's your secret?

You know what I tell them?

We never eat at Pizza Hut.

I stopped getting perms.

And oh, you know Julia Roberts?

We never go to her movies...

;)

- Leslie

Guest Post #3: So, That's Why

Our Guest Post today is brought to you by my dear friend, Cindi, from So, That's Why. Cindi and I go WAAAAAYYYYY back . . . to that old "Glee" life in High School. As a matter of fact, here is a photo of Cindi and I doing our 'thing' . . . 

Oh, yeah! That's us. And we were IT!!! Cindi is a pretty awesome person who works two jobs (one is teaching!!!), is raising two amazing kids, is a major digital scrapbook guru, and just an amazing person all around. She brings out the very best in me, and I am so very grateful for her presence in my life. She wrote a great piece this week about procrastinating, which is think works hand in hand with a post I just last week on my own procrastinating tendencies. So, without further adieu, I give you Cindi and her post titled . . . 

Life is too short to do it later

I’ve got a huge problem. See, I procrastinated writing this blog post for my dear friend Leanne. Her blog is so cool, and I didn’t want to disappoint her followers. I’ve had a little performance anxiety. So I kept finding other “more important” things to do. Like….cutting the grass….and vacuuming….and watching the season finale of Psych. Again. See, even though I teach a writing class at the local community college, I’ve discovered I’m better at asking other people to write things than I am at actually sitting down and doing it myself.

I always have the best of intentions. I just don’t often have the inspirations. I have stacks of books on writing, hundreds of pens that I bought thinking I’d be inspired by them and dozens of blank journals to write in. Yep. They are still nearly as blank as the day I bought them. For shame. And while I update my blog when the spirit moves me, I’ve yet to find a regular writing habit. That’s, yet another reason why I’m so impressed with Leanne. Somehow, she gets past the writer’s block and she regularly publishes excellent, inspiring, hilarious posts. She inspired me to kick start my blog last year. Maybe she’s done the same for you.

Well, no more procrastinating for me. Nope. I am hereby making a pledge to stop delaying my life. Because, that’s what it really is. Delaying. Life is too short to do it later. You will no longer catch me saying….”well, I still have 3 days until it’s due”, or “I can do that later”, or “I’ll do it when I finish relaxing”. (Oh, there will still be as much relaxing as I need, just no extra as an excuse to avoid doing something.) The new me will have already written this post for Leanne, not only because I love her and don’t want to let her down, but because I enjoy writing. I really do. I’ve also decided to put my own pen to paper, right along with my students, because there’s really no better time for me to write than when I ask them to…..hey, I’ll even get my blog updated!

So, thanks, From Chaos to Happiness readers. You have inspired me to get my procrastinating self back on track. Thanks Leanne, for asking me to write a post for your awesome blog. (And sorry for being late.) I hope your vacation is all you dreamed it would be!

- Cindi

Guest Post #2: Small Steps to Giant Leaps

Our second Guest Blogger is one of my dearest friends on this earth, Peggy, from Small Steps to Giant Leaps. PK and I actually met through my sister years and years ago, and we developed a bond that can probably only be understood by the two of us. Peggy exudes a sense of balance and peace that I can only dream of having, and I am so very very grateful to call her my friend. I'm so glad to introduce you to a little bit of her wisdom and insite, so without further adieu I proudly present Peggy and her post titled . . .  

May you always…

We are fortunate to see my older grandson, “JAK”, every week. On Sunday, we pick him up from his mom’s and then his dad (my son) picks him up at our house a few hours later. During those weekly visits, we have played “restaurant”, planted a garden, built all sorts of contraptions out of the boxes in the recycling bin, walked to the park to climb the monkey bars, and taken Barney (our dog) on numerous walks. Barney has always considered JAK his pal, since Barney was around when JAK was born. They have a special bond.

During one walk with Grandpa and Barney a few years ago, they came across some dandelions going to seed.

Now, everyone knows that those exist for the sole purpose of making wishes. You close your eyes, make a wish and blow. Seeds scatter and your wish goes with them, out to the universe, out to God. So JAK did just that.

Picked up a dandelion, closed his eyes, made a wish and blew.

Then he picked up another, told Grandpa to close his eyes and make a wish. They walked a little further, JAK stopped, picked up one more and told Grandpa he would make a wish for Barney. He thought for a moment, closed his eyes and blew. Grandpa then asked him what he had wished (really had to convince him it was okay to tell the wish). And although he was reluctant at first, JAK finally told Grandpa his wish for Barney.

May you always go for long walks and may you always have plenty to eat.

Grandpa’s heart melted on the spot. Mine melted when they returned home and I heard about the wish. But it made us realize just how very important it is to foster compassion in our little ones.

“Compassion is the desire that moves the individual self to widen the scope of its self-concern to embrace the whole of the universal self.” Arnold Toynbee

As video games grow in popularity, our kids are exposed to violence at an increasingly younger age. How many times have we been sick to stomachs when we hear of a 5 year old shooting the little brother when they found their parent’s gun? News reports show our world divided by intolerance to other cultures and religions. Teaching our kids compassion shows them how easy it is to be tolerant of others, no matter the differences.

Barney sees JAK as a “brother”. JAK sees Barney as one of the family. It’s as simple as that. Wouldn’t it be nice if it were that simple with the rest of the world?

- Peggy

Guest Post #1: Bossy Betty

Starting off our week of amazing Guest Bloggers is Bossy Betty, an absolutely brilliant writer, story teller, and photographer whose blog I started following about 12 months ago, and who has enriched my life not only with the wonderful posts on her blog, but through her heart felt, supportive, and always humorous comments on my blog. I adore this woman. She is my idol . . . and I can only hope to some day reach the hearts and funny bones of my blog friends as she manages to do every day. Without further adieu, I present you with Guest Post #1, Bossy Betty, and her story titled . . .

Bon Voyage Every Day

When I leave for work in the morning, I run into school traffic--parents dropping off their kids at the local schools near our house. If I am early enough, I also see some parents dropping off their high schools students at the nearby bus stop. The traffic is slow, stop and go, and there's plenty of time to gaze into other cars and do some people-watching.

Yesterday morning I caught sight of a woman in a car who was moving her mouth as though it was full of old, dry toast that she was determined to chew up then spit it out. At first I thought she must have Bluetooth in her car and whoever was on the other end of the line was getting an earful, a royal chewing out. She stared straight ahead and worked that mouth vigorously without stopping. I watched her and couldn't help but almost start to laugh at the scene. But then, as I inched the car forward, I saw her high school-aged son in the passenger's seat. It was clear: he was the one she was directing all that sputum towards. My amusement turned to sorrow. You could see the defeated look in his eyes as he turned his head and gazed out the window.

The traffic moved ahead and in another car I saw another parent, obviously not too happy with her middle school student who sat slumped in her seat. There was a Lecture in progress in that car for sure. You could just see the yearning of the girl, waiting to get out, away from that voice, away from the negativity. In another car, a father sat expressionless and silent as he drove his daughter to school.

Those scenes yesterday morning made me think about days when I was in school and felt like no one understood me, or even cared about me. It was rare, but there were days when my mom was mad at me as I left for school, and it set the tone for the whole day. I went to school and found no love there, only rules I had to follow, and more adults I had to placate. It was miserable.

Our son is in high school, and every year we go to his school's Back to School night. There, we a small taste of what he faces on a daily basis. We follow his schedule of classes, (for short, ten minute classes instead of the hour long ones he goes to) going from one room to another and then to another, from one teacher to another, to another, pushed along by an obscenely loud and harsh bell.

His high school is huge, his classes are huge, every teacher assigns work, and there is very little time for individual attention. There are different rules in every room. This teacher wants them to use a blue pen. This one demands they write out the date and not use numbers. One teacher wants a certain kind of binder. The math teacher demands graph paper. The English teacher wants them to put their names on the left hand side of the paper only. Every day he leaves home where he has our expectations to meet and our rules to follow. Then he goes to school and deals with six authority figures at school, all of who have rules and expectations for him to follow and meet.

It seems to me, as parents, we have a golden opportunity every morning, and we often blow it, not understanding the power that we have in those few minutes before our children set out on their days. So often we use any time we have with them to inform, direct, instruct, and to make very clear the things we are not happy about, and make very clear how our children can make the changes we see as necessary.

It's a rough world out there and sometimes we make it even rougher for the ones we love the most. So this morning when a certain young man leaves for school, I intend tell him that I love him, that I am proud of him, and if he needs me for anything, I am just a phone call away. I know he'll roll his eyes, shirk away from my hug, and say "OK, Mom, OK."

He'll leave, walking with that familiar gait I can spot for a mile. He'll carry that heavy backpack on his narrow shoulders.

What I want him to carry as well is the innate knowledge of how much I admire him. I want him to carry with him the deep knowledge that as he navigates these turbulent waters of his high school years, if he drops an oar now and then, that it's OK.

I hope my morning goodbye to him lets him know that he has people who will help him find that oar again, who will be the solid surface he can use to steady himself, and who will send him out on his journey again with love, encouragement and best wishes.

- Bossy Betty

My Very Own "Annie Liebovitz"

Did I ever tell you that my Ella is a budding photographer? Yep, she sure is. I have my very own Annie Liebovitz on my hands, I do, I do. Her fascination with the camera started such a long time ago, and is probably a direct result of her father (PG) always putting a camera in her face to capture her dimples and smile. She'd smile for the photo, then beg for the camera and an opportunity to take her own pictures. So, we passed on Katie's little Fisher Price camera and let her go at it. . .

. . . except, the Fisher Price camera was WAY TOO easy for Ella. There is no challenge in this camera - no zoom - no flash - nothing. Just click and go. Which is probably perfect for a number of children out there, but not for Ella.

So, we found ourselves letting her use our "GROWN UP" camera. Probably not the best idea, but one that we felt we had no choice but to do. I mean, imagine what the world would be like if Monet or Van Gogh's mothers never handed them a paint brush? So, we hand her the camera and she goes. And sometimes, in between the shots of the floor and the couch and the driveway, we see some really cool things through Ella's eyes. . . including the marker on her feet . . .

However, every once in a while, things seem a little LARGER THAN LIFE. Like this photo (below) that I just discovered as I emptied the digital pictures from the camera onto our computer tonight. Let's just imagine that this bottom belongs to someone else, and NOT the person writing this post, shall we? (Oh, and you can thank me for not posting this photo LARGER than it really needs to be. You get the point with it just as it is, don't you?)

I threw the heart on there just to do SOMETHING to block out that God awful view. 

Poor Ella . . . sometimes seeing the world through her eyes may not always be pretty. But it's real. Every single bit of it.

Gotta run . . . I hear SPANX are on sale this week. I've got some shopping to do . . .that is, after I ride my exercise bike for 24 hours straight! ;)

Works for Me

I work best under pressure. Some would say "extreme" pressure. I'm the worst kind of procrastinator, the kind that waits until the final minutes for most things in life. I've always been that way - and I'm not even sure how that started, because if you knew the rest of my family - you would know that they are nothing like that. I come from a family of planners. Organizers. People who prepare and execute in the most timeliness of timelines.

Me? I wing it. All of the time.

From preparing for Christmas or hosting a party, to creating art or packing for vacation, I find that I do my best work under the tick tock of the clock. I don't stress (usually ... until the very last minute ...) and I push myself up to the very end. Why? Well . . . it's just what works for me. And believe it or not, I am usually able to pull things off without much of a hitch. My sister laughs when she stops at my house the morning of a party, only to find PG sitting on the couch watching a movie and me on the computer ... with the house in complete disarray. But, hours later, she'll return and things are cleaned and ready as if we've been preparing for days. What can I say? PG seems to work like me, so we are a good pair and get it done. Works for me!

This upcoming trip to Disney, which I have been talking so much about (sorry about that), is no exception. My mom (one of 8 grown ups going on the trip) has been planning and preparing for months. She's got every outfit set, and I'm sure they are folded and laid out in her guest room just ready for entering the suitcase. Me? I haven't bought a single thing for myself. This is stressing Mom out, I'm certain, as I know she keeps hinting that I should go here or there for some new cloths. I'll get there. . . under the pressure of the clock. You see, I just can't start too early. That just doesn't work for me.

Earlier this week I received an email from a fellow blogger who asked, "So, are you ready for Disney?" Yikes. I guess maybe I should start getting my thoughts together about it...especially if a fellow blogger is asking me. That same day, Ella and Katie received the coolest package from their Auntie Ria (aka Maria) in the mail, full of lots and lots of traveling goodies (journals, UNO cards, Mickey Mouse band aids, and disposable cameras for each of them to use on their trip). Auntie Ria is the BEST, and probably knew that I would be running around like a chicken with her head cut off this week, so she planned ahead and picked up some things for the girls. How cool is this package?

So, I guess I should start planning and preparing for our trip. I guess it is time to start laying out the cloths and counting pairs of socks. I better makes sure our shoes are set and count the undies. Yes . . . I think maybe this time I'll try and be a little more prepared. I know one thing . . . Ella is ready!!! She's been wearing her Snow White dress for DAYS now . . . Saturday morning, we have a date with the Princesses for breakfast - and my little Princess Ella CAN'T WAIT!!!

How about you? Are you totally prepared and organized for life? Or are you like me and work best under pressure? I'd love to know what works for you . . . leave a comment and let me know!

Leasons learned when selling our treasures!

Hello Dear friends!!! Well, we made it! We survived our Garage Sale of the Century! And boy-oh-boy, I'm tired! After a few nights of gathering goodies, folding kids clothes, and pricing our treasures, we had a most successful sale this weekend! In the end, we sold lots of our old treasures and banked a whopping $262.00. Not bad for 2 days work, huh? Here are a few of the things I learned during this years sale:

• The items you really think will sell . . . don't
• The items you think will NOT sell . . . do
• The people who look like they have all the money in the world, will usually pay with pennies, and those who look like they don't have a penny to spend will end up pulling out a wad of cash from their pockets
• Long haired men with scruffy faces and tattoos covering their arms should not be judged by their rough appearance ... they end up being the most delightful customer who you wish would pull up a chair and sit with, just so you can hear their life story
• A man with a really thick southern drawl may actually have lived in the midwest for 40 years . . . he just can't quit his "Texan" sound
• 'Good Stuff Cheap' is a great motto for ones sale ... if your prices are low enough, people will buy just about anything (except when your 7-yr old tells them, "No, that's not a very good Barbie Movie. I didn't like it." They might not purchase the DVD for 25 cents after that one!)
• giving a little stuffed animal to a small child for free, and watching them (and their Mom) light up with smiles, is just about the sweetest thing ever
• A little rain doesn't stop people from shopping
• I need to stay away from little babies . . . because when I see one, I almost want another (well, almost!) 

So, yes, we had a fantastic sale . . . and have a little extra spending money for our upcoming trip to Disney! We leave later in this week - I'm hoping to catch up on all your blogs (with comments, too!) by tonight. I have a couple other stories to share with you this week, then a fantastic line up of guest bloggers while I'm gone (thanks ladies!!) I may even have my husband write something, too (imagine a post by our very own PG! How exciting!)

Until then, I wish you all a fantastically peaceful remainder of the weekend surrounded by love and laughter. Be good to each other!

Remembering

Today, I remember.

To those who didn't see it coming . . . whose lives were forced to end so suddenly . . . 

you will forever be in my heart and in my prayers.

I am eternally grateful for the sacrifice you were forced to make on that day,

and I am forever changed by your absence from our world.

Like so many of you, today I am thinking of all of those whose lives were lost,

or drastically changed, 9 years ago.

Image from Newseum in Washington D.C. of what was left of the antenna from one of the WTC buildings.

May we all stop and think about what we felt on this day not so long ago.

May we remember the feelings we had the days following and

how we united as a nation and as a people.

And someday,

may we,

our children

and our childrens children,

live in a world of peace.

I am wishing you peace today, dear friend.

This is Shocking News, Friends!!!

BUT . . . I think I'm loosing my coolness. I used to be cool (if you know me - don't laugh. This is my blog - you go ahead and just let me think that I used to be cool, ok?)

I digress . . . I used to be cool. Kids on the block used to laugh at me, my neighbors son used to like to hang out and talk to me, my nephew used to think I was the coolest Aunt around. But every once in a while, something happens that puts me right into reality . . . and I realize that I'm not as cool as I think I am.

Like a couple weeks ago, when I went to a high school football game to cheer on the son of a dear longtime friend of mine, Karen. There in the football stands, I felt like a kid again - it was SO MUCH FUN! I clapped, I cheered, I remembered days of High School Past when I had a crush on the quarterback. Ahhh . . . it was so fun. Except a few things were different from how they used to be back during my high school days. This time, I was there with my husband and my kids. This time, instead of watching for the cute high school boys to walk by, I saw my very own 15 year old nephew and realized that he is 1) old enough to go to high school and 2) one of the adorable boys that I would have surely been gaga over had I been a high school girl. My nephew was pretty surprised to see me, and when he asked what I was doing there, goofy me tried to be silly and said, "I'm watching the baseball game!" He left quickly after that - I think I embarrassed him. This time, instead of saying a prayer for the players on the field, I felt myself saying prayers that we wouldn't end up in the Emergency Room as PG (who still thinks he is in high school) tried to climb out of the stands by maneuvering his body between two railings in such a way that I was certain would lead to broken bones. Yes, attending this football game was such fun, but a big reality check.

I am not as cool as I think I am!

Or, like a few days later, when my friends 4 year old daughter, Maggie, put me in my place (I believe the correct modern word would be "dissed" - the act of being spoken to in a disrespectful way. I never quite got a handle on that word. I always forget what the word is and say, "dished" and then the neighborhood kids look at me like I've got 2 heads. hmmmm. . . .)  Maggie is an absolute JOY in my life - she's a little spitfire of fun, she has the absolute BEST laugh in the whole wide world, and she is a partner in crime with my Ella. When the two are together - there is always TROUBLE! So, this afternoon Maggie was hanging out with Ella and I for a few hours. The two girls were upstairs in Ella's room playing, when I went to check on them. There they sat, on Ella's bed, with a little toy keyboard on the floor and Katie's guitar in front of them. The keyboard was on demo mode, and was playing a song (some christmas jingle, I believe) over and over. And Ella and Maggie were dancing and laughing and having the time of their life. I decided that I would join in their party, and (from the hallway, mind you) decided to start bobbing my head back and forth and moving my arms like doing the twist. I was having FUN. Dancing. With the kids. All of a sudden, dear Maggie said, "Aunt Leanne?" "Yes, honey, what is it?" I asked, expecting her to say something about what a good dancer I was or what good voice I had, or something like that. "Could you go downstairs?" she asked. I was cramping their style - and little Mags wanted me gone. Wow.

I am not as cool as I think I am!

Maybe it is the recent eye rolls that Katie has started giving this year. She's only 7 - can it be that she already knows EVERYTHING??? Do I have a genius on my hands? I used to know what was cool for kids to wear . . . but I guess I don't anymore. Nope, I'm not as cool as I think I am.

This is a big realization coming from me. But one that I'm enjoying. This next chapter . . . the Not Cool Chapter . . . is the one I've really looked forward to most. This chapter includes embarrassing the kids - like checking the mail with HUGE rollers on, and wearing a MOO-MOOs when Katie has friends over! What fun!!! I may not be cool . . . but I'll be laughing A LOT at my non-coolness!

Have you done anything "not cool" lately? I'd love to know.

Going Once ... Going Twice ... SOLD!

In an effort to simplify my life, and make a little extra spending money for our upcoming trip to Disney, I am having a garage sale to end all garage sales! I'm giving in to the demons of my past and am letting go to some valuable items that I cherished oh-so long ago. Items that have been so cherished by me, that they have spent the past 9 years in boxes in my basement.

To prepare for my garage sale, I've been watching episodes of Hoarders. Have you seen any of those shows? Absolutely scary. 10 minutes into one of these shows Monday night, and I had to pause the program and go clean my refrigerator (even though I had just cleaned it the day before.) I think this show is the best medicine for anyone who wants to purge. And that is exactly what I am feeling the need to do.

So PG and I spent a good part of the day on Monday cleaning up the storage area - a little spot in our basement that hasn't been touched (really) since we moved in (9 years ago). I must have 10 boxes marked "Memories" that I have moved from one place to another through the years, and finally opened up this week to evaluate. What were those 'memories'? Oh, most of them were items from high school and college, and about 90% of it was thrown away after taking this stroll down "memory lane" this week. I decided that I really didn't need my "Intro to Costuming" binder from an ISU class I took years ago, and that the program from a play that I don't even remember seeing doesn't need to be kept. So, the garbage bags came out . . .and slowly we went through box after box.

My head is a little less stuffy now. I feel a little lighter, like I've gotten rid of some unnecessary baggage. Some of the stuff is staying for an attempt at a happier life in someone else's home. So, starting Friday at 8AM, I'm hoping someone else will decide that they absolutely can not live without:

• Three plastic 'chinese food cartons' that the Container Store suckered me into adding to a collection of other unnecessary containers
• An "All My Children" hard cover picture book telling you all the secrets of Pine Valley (in 1995)
• An old gum ball machine
• A Marilyn Monroe watch (in decorative collectors box to match) that I just had to buy (in 1987)
• 10 little soft covered books on making paper air planes that I must have purchased for a real 'bargain' long before I even had kids (I wonder how many children I thought I was going to have that I thought I would have to buy 10 of these little books!)
• A tulip flower centerpiece that actually is quiet lovely . . . . but I just don't want any longer
• a lovely collection of frames and movie poster prints that haven't been on my walls in close to 5 years
• a HUGE assortment of baby toys and clothes
• 4 different flower girl dresses in sizes from 2, 3 and 4 Toddler (Katie was a busy girl between the ages of 2 and 4!)
• a box of plastic ware bought from Target at the end of a summer season about 5 years ago (that I continue to forget, year after year)
• and lots and lots of other things . . .

So, what have I learned?

There is absolutely NOTHING in this world that I NEED . . . with the exception of my family and our health. These boxes of memories, when really looked into, are nothing to me. The life I had 10 years ago, while helped me become the person I am today, is not who I am today. I am so much more than the memories of the past - and I don't need these things to be me. Last weekend, a dear friend of mine from my high school and college days came over with her children and spent the evening with me and my family. THAT is what I need in life ... real life folks and laughter and fun ... not boxes filled with things.

So . . .

Garage Sale, here I come!

When was the last time you went through your old memory boxes? Ever feel the need to simplify all those things in your basement? I'd love to know . . .

Oh, and if you think any of the items I've listed above would find themselves a lovely new home in your heart ... send me an email! I can "hook you up!" ;)